The Sex Reimagined Podcast

Britton & Carolee Beckham: She Burned Her Wedding Dress - The Ritual That Transformed Our Sexless Marriage | #155

• Leah Piper & Dr. Willow Brown • Season 3 • Episode 155

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When Britton and Carolee Beckham first got married in the Mormon church, they had no idea their journey would include serial infidelity, religious trauma, childhood sexual abuse, and eventually... authentic healing. Most couples facing religious trauma and infidelity end in divorce. Britton and Carolee Beckham prove there's another way. Their transformation from a shame-filled Mormon marriage to conscious partnership offers hope for anyone trapped in cycles of betrayal and spiritual awakening. 


EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS

  • The Church Process Fail: Spent a year following Mormon protocols for healing infidelity - it made the trauma worse
  • Plant Medicine Breakthrough: First psilocybin ceremony in 2019 led to immediately leaving the church after seeing childhood indoctrination clearly
  • The Pattern Recognition: Infidelity always coincided with pregnancies due to unhealed trauma and mismatched desire
  • Standing Up to Patriarchy: Carolee told off 12 Mormon leaders: "You've missed the mark. There's no support for women."
  • Conscious Uncoupling & Recoupling: Both burned their marriage certificate, then remarried themselves under a blood moon
  • The Full F*ck Yes: Sold everything and traveled the world with four kids after ISTA sexual education training
  • Current Mission: Building a 46-acre retreat center in Colorado to help other couples heal


LINKS & RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE CAN BE FOUND ON THE WEBSITE: https://www.sexreimagined.com/blog/Mormon-Couple-Plagued-By-Infidelity-and-Religious-Trauma

AWAKENING THE GODDESS IN CRETE! Leah & Willow want to take you on an all-woman's tantric pilgrimage to Greece Oct 5-12, 2025! Join us for a trip of lifetime. 

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Willow:

What happens when infidelity transforms from relationship destruction into a spiritual awakening? Today's guests turned their darkest moment into a radical path of healing that's challenging everything we thought we knew about betrayal and connection. I'm Dr. Willow Brown. I'm here with my incredible co-host, Leah Piper of the Sex Reimagined podcast. We are so grateful for all of your likes, shares, and subscribes. Please keep them coming. And today we are going to be talking with Britton and Carolee relationship alchemists and creators of the magical story of us. And I'm so excited for this conversation. It's gonna be powerful.

Leah:

That's right. So it is time to tune in, turn on, and fall in love with, Brit Carolee. And

Announcer:

Welcome to the Sex Reimagined Podcast, where sex is shame-free and pleasure forward. Let's get into the show.

Leah:

welcome to the show.

Carolee:

Thanks. Thank you.

Willow:

So you guys have been on quite a journey, both raised Mormon and following that path in your earlier years, which did not lead you in the direction you wanted to be going to the direction of joy and happiness. Um, and then you had like, it sounds like a big eruption and, and major way to, through a lot of healing and I'm sure through a lot of portals of, of challenge and growth that led you to being in a very beautiful, blissful relationship all of this while raising four kids. So, I mean, tell us all.

Leah:

Where does your story begin?

Brit:

Well, it, it begins, um, it begins with when we, when we first got married, like, um, after the first year there was, um.

Leah:

old were you when you got married, and where did you meet?

Carolee:

Yeah, it began at church actually. There we go. We met at church. We met, um, at a ward, uh, or a congregation that was for singles within the Mormon faith. Um, and that was 2009, 2008? Yeah, 2008. I was 25 and he was 26. Um, those ages are actually a little bit old for traditional like Mormon culture. Um, normal, normal Mormons get married at like 21, mid 22, mid early twenties. Um, so we were a little bit older. But yeah, we met at a, at a congregation that was specifically aimed to help single Mormons meet each other so that there could be marriages produced from, from that.'cause there's a lot of cultural push to, to get married. Um, we, we got pregnant and then miscarried, but within like, kind of the first year of our relationship, uh, of our marriage, um, we married a year after a meeting. And, um, infidelity and some threads of that kind of started early on, like with in alignment with like that the first pregnancy that actually took, um, our oldest is now 13. So we, we stayed in the church up until 2019 is when we stopped attending for good. Um, that was immediately following, um, a plant medicine journey. And, um, that's, there's, there's so many, I mean, you can just tell me what parts you wanna like dive more into, but that's.

Leah:

so many

Willow:

Dive into all of them. Like, don't hold back. Yeah. Give us the

Leah:

I'm kind of

brit & carolee | interview:

One of the things that, oh, sorry. Go ahead.

Leah:

Yeah. Um, one of the things I'm curious about is, is infidelity more common in Mormon relationships than most of us would assume?

Carolee:

Ooh, that's a good question. I

brit & carolee | interview:

would think so. I, I don't know, I don't have a definite answer on that, but I would think so because most people are gonna think, most people are going to assume that Mormons are very, uh, committed to their faith. And so they, they don't make mistakes like that, you know, quote unquote mistakes. So, um, but yeah, we found in, in our process of healing, we found a lot of couples dealing with this,

Leah:

Mm-hmm.

Willow:

Okay.

brit & carolee | interview:

I'll say. That like, you know, early on we didn't actually know how to approach healing this. We, we actually went through the mechanisms that the church provided. When you have a significant sin, um, they want you to go through certain kind of actions. And we did all of that. Um, but that is around like around 2017. We had a moment where it was kind of this make or break, we're gonna need to get into therapy or we're done kind of direction. And, um, it was through. Therapy that we actually began to see where the church didn't hold any emotional intelligence, didn't hold any true healing for what we had been through. And the clinic that I found in u, we were living in Utah at the time. Um, it's a great clinic. It's called ato, and it, their, their emphasis, their specialty is betrayal trauma. It's, um, uh, so there's a lot of women. I did a, a trauma informed yoga cont like class there, um, a therapy group. And it was all women who had been betrayed in various levels between like whether it was pornography, um, use, um, sexting or like full fledged affairs. Um, it was pretty prolific because there's so much control and shame and like suppression that even like, like. The culture that we came from. We didn't actually know how to set healthy boundaries. We didn't actually know how to make relational agreements. There's a lot of mechanisms of control and how you're supposed to be and role division and all of that to where betrayal can be sneaky and it can come in in so many ways. So I would say that because of the lack of that emotional intelligence foundation that came from the culture that um, to the extent of like how many affairs are there, I can't really go that far, but in the sense of the threads of betrayal in relationship and being woven, it's, it's high, I would guess. Well, they have, like the statistics that the church has on males that are addicted to pornography are struggling with pornography is, is around 70% of the active male population. So it's a huge percentage that are dealing with it. And they have no, the church has no idea how to how to handle it or how to approach it. Like it's just more of like the guilt shame story. Like stop looking at it, you know, like your blessings go away if you continue this like so, yeah.

Willow:

if you do this, which furthers and perpetuates the desire and the need to do it because it's a, it's a distraction from the shame that you're feeling, right? It's like, oh my God, I'm feeling good. I'm having an orgasm. I'm finally feeling good, you know, feeling. And it's like, yeah, I wanna go toward that. I don't wanna like, go toward being more ashamed. I feel like, gosh, all, all religions can put so much pressure on us that really, um, can, can drive us toward these, uh, things like porn and sugar and, you know, things that make us feel good in the moment.

Leah:

Yeah, I am curious, uh, Bri, what's the messaging, uh, from your upbringing and you too, Carol Lee, regarding Mormonism and Sex? What's the messaging about, like what's okay, what's not Okay? Both Willow and I grew up Catholic. I also spent 10 years in Pentecostal church. So there's some, like, some clear messaging about what's okay and what's not okay. And also like the rules are slightly different. It always felt like to me, between boys and girls, I'm curious what it was like for you guys growing up.

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah, so for, for young men, um, you know, it was like no masturbation and then no dating till 16 and no being alone essentially. No. Like, um, being horizontal with, with a girl. That was kind of like a, sort of a dogmatic teaching. Um, and then it was just celibacy before marriage. And then, you know, and once you're in, once you're married, it was like, so we always say the no, no, no. And then once you're married, go, go, go. But they don't have, there's no doctrinal teaching around it. They say stuff like. You know, um, sex and marriage is, is like how you connect with God. It's, it's like how we become like, and this is a very universal concept right across, across the planet, but there is nothing besides like that sort of trite statement that, um, that offers anybody anything to understand about sex. So it's just this, no, no, no shame stuff. And then when you are, and then when you're married, it's like anything's okay as long as you're both comfortable with it. So that's kind of what we walked into. I knew I wanted to have, yeah, I knew I wanted to have like, um, I knew I wanted to have oral sex. I knew I wanted to do a lot of different things with her that I'd actually already done outside of marriage. I'd broken the rules many times actually. Um. I was the rebel. Yeah. I, so I found myself in the, in the Mormon bishop's office quite a bit because I was repenting of my sins of connecting with, women and girls. I was even in teenage years having that, that issue. So for, yeah. And then for, for girls, it's like, uh, even a little bit different. Yeah. For, I mean, again, that no, no, no kind of concept of you can't do anything and then you're married. We, we have friends that we know who literally didn't even kiss their spouse until the day of their wedding. Um, and that was like two, that's extreme. Yeah. That was extreme, but it was like a real accomplishment, you know, like, I'm really honoring this. Yeah. Um,

Willow:

Oh yeah.

Leah:

Yeah.

Willow:

right? What a different perspective on life that is. Yeah.

brit & carolee | interview:

so different. Um, some other things though is there was a lot of, uh, purity culture that like came through so, and, and the, the importance, the person that was supposed to hold it often was like the woman right in, in her dress. So there was deep programming from my childhood of like, I couldn't cover, I couldn't show my shoulders, um, I couldn't dress in a certain way. Um, because Mormons, yeah, modesty is so important. Um, and if I dress in a certain way and a man has a problem, then it's my responsibility. Yeah. So there's some of that actually, there's a, a lot of that. Um, and, and I'll say I went into our marriage.

Willow:

biology. It's just, it's so

brit & carolee | interview:

it's so hard it, I went into our marriage actually still believing to a great extent that women do need to dress properly so that they aren't activating men. Like that's, it was deep programming, so, they kind of tell women in, like classroom settings or whatever, and meetings where they're like, you need to dress better so the, so that the guys will honor you and that sort of thing.

Leah:

your male sexual desires, your fault and your responsibility.

Carolee:

Yeah.

Leah:

so in order to keep the men in line, it's your responsibility to help control their desires basically by not being sexy.

Willow:

So rooted in the oppression of the feminine that's been going on for so many eons. Um, okay. So tell us, tell us what happened. Like, when, when was the turning point? What was the inflection point of like, okay, we gotta do something different, or this isn't gonna work

Leah:

Yeah, it

Willow:

when did you

Leah:

was like the affair, right? And then you guys did therapy and it sounds like that was a big pattern interrupt, you found good therapists?

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah.

Leah:

okay

brit & carolee | interview:

She found a pretty good therapist. And then we went to couple, we also did couples as at the same time, and that lasted, um, for a little while. We, it wasn't super effective. I didn't feel like it was for me. And then I went and had my own therapist and, and I had some breakthroughs as well in, in that. But what, what we could say is that, you know, like she said, there was like the full fledged affair in 2017. And then we went through this church process in 2017 to 2018 and after we came through the, out, out, the exit of that, it was like clear that it was just. The church wasn't really capable of doing much in the way of helping, and it was just offering us a bypass, a spiritual bypass pathway of like, change your environment, don't talk to these people. You know, like it was basically all of the chest moves that, the chest moves that, uh, would protect you. But it's actually, there's no internal change because I still feel tempted, I still felt the attraction to other women. I still wanted more from her, but she, she wasn't embodied in, in a way to offer that. So there was still this thing, but we were actually in, we were healing in a way that we were reconnecting and allowing ourselves to like feel more into each other again, that we had sort of blocked off and all of that heartache and heart wall had built up. But it was in the end of 20, um. Towards the end of 2019 when she, you know, she mentioned we did a, a mushroom, the, a mushroom ceremony. And the reason why we got into that is we had sort, sort of dabbled in alcohol and wine, which is, you know, a non, not a Mormon thing. You don't, you kind of abstain from that. Um, not kind of, you do, you do and yeah.

Willow:

up Don't drink.

Leah:

Yeah.

brit & carolee | interview:

stayed. Yeah. My mother did cry when I told her that we were drinking alcohol. Yeah. That was a hard moment for her.

Willow:

followed by many more hard moments it sounds like.

brit & carolee | interview:

Just all those kids. Exactly. And she's, she's still learning all about our journey right now, so.

Willow:

gonna learn a lot more as your podcast starts to launch. My mom doesn't listen to my podcast. I tell her not to. So you might wanna do the same.

Leah:

I don't think anyone in my family listens either. I think my youngest sisters listen to a few episodes. Um, okay. So please continue,

Willow:

go on.

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah. Uh, so at the, so what happened was we sort of dabbled in that, and that kind of was like a therapy in a bottle and open. It was the gateway into exploring with other things. And my brother, who was already sort of out of the church for a long time, um, you know, kind of was key in kind of introducing to us more of like, like cannabis. And then he, one day he came by and he, we were all like hanging out and smoking some weed and, you know, we were sort of less active in the Mormon church. We weren't fully active. We were sort of like not interested as much, but we were definitely still in it. Um, but then, uh, he dropped this bag of mushrooms on my counter and was like, bro, you gotta check this out. And I was like, oh my God, my brother's a junkie. I gotta get away from this. It was like, so scary. And so I was like, yeah.

Willow:

That could be an episode for you guys.

brit & carolee | interview:

Um, and so I was like, I was like, I don't know about that man. And he was like, well, you should just read this book. And he introduced the book, um, how To Change Your Mind with Michael Poland. And, um, and so I was like, okay. And I, somebody else actually recommended it like a, a week later, you know? And so like the cro, the cosmic breadcrumbs dropped and, and so I listened to it. I do audio books. And then, um, after, during that, it like totally opened my mind to like, trying it and to like seeing this from a spiritual perspective. And so I was like, Carollee, you gotta like listen to this book and if you want, let's do a ceremony together. And so we did. And that happened in the end of 2019. Um, and so we did the ceremony together and it was really beautiful. Yeah, it was. And had a huge process around it. And, um, the next day we went to church and it was a, uh. It was a, it was like, um, a, like a program for kids to come up and like, participate. And basically we were still in the afterglow of the mushrooms and we had high perception and um, and we saw the indoctrination so clearly of what was going on with these young children. And it was like, we just sort of like looked at each other. We were like, we're out, we're done. We're outta here. This is it.

Willow:

Ooh, I got chills all over my whole body. Yes.

Leah:

Wow.

brit & carolee | interview:

So that was the last time we went.

Willow:

Thank you. Mushroom friends. Yeah. For the awakening. That's so powerful. That's so deep. Now, did you continue to do, um, those journeys with each other after, after that initial one, or did you take like a long integration period?

brit & carolee | interview:

So I was really excited about what happened with the mushrooms and I was feeling a call and to, to another session. So like a month later, um, we had an opportunity where we were up in Park City, Utah, and um mm-hmm. And so we did another one up in Park City at a resort. And during that session. I had, uh, I mean, it was an incredibly, incredibly powerful session for us. It was like, um, every spiritual piece of,'cause we had just left the church, and so we were like, you know, in a way free falling in in our spirituality. We were like, well, what is this all about? And we were asking for, you know, we were asking for more insight for sure. But, um, we had a very sacred experience and I had a kundalini awakening. And in that awakening, I experienced my total worth and my, my true identity and, um, my nature, my eternal nature. And that was like so mind expanding for me that I realized the number one thing I walked away from that was I realized my heart had been closed my whole life basically. And so I was able to walk away with that and say. Well, one, I know magic's real now. And two, my heart is the key to listening to my spirit, my emotions, right? And so I, I decided from that time forward that I was going to let my heart lead the way. And I had an actual, like, commitment and I was like, Hey, left brain, you've got me to this place that I'm at. Which hasn't always, that hasn't really been good. You've kept me in fear. You've, you've tried to lead me, but it's never really been the thing that's brought me joy. And so I'm gonna let my heart lead. I'm gonna let the right brain lead now. And, and that was a big change in my, my spiritual awakening journey.

Leah:

Wow.

Willow:

was this second one that you guys did in Park City? Was it just the two of you or were you being guided by a facilitator?

brit & carolee | interview:

So the first one was guided and then this, this one in Park City was, was just us. We felt pro at that time, you know? Yeah.

Willow:

we can, we got this. We're, we're

brit & carolee | interview:

We kind of guide each other, you know? Yeah. Um, that second one, our youngest daughter, who is now four, she was not born yet, and she actually came. Um, and her energy was very present during that ceremony as well. So we, um, went back home and, um, within two months actually had conceived her. Um, and so there was another period, even though the, the pregnancies had been the hardest part of our marriage. Yeah. The pregnancies always correlated with, um, like, I guess you could say a relapse into, uh, infidelity. The infidelity always came about, so we had been saying. In Mormonism, having a lot of kids is very common and people ask all the time, when are you having more threes? Not very many. Four is a pretty, okay, number five, six. Better kind of, you know, at least in, in our upbringings, we both come from families of six children. And so, um, Britain had been asked, we had been asked by people, um, when are you, are you having another? And he had been saying for years prior to all of this, God himself will have to tell me that we're having another. Um, and what everybody else didn't understand is I, I had like zero desire. My desire, it wasn't just zero, it was like in the negative. And I've identified now that a lot of that actually had it was generational. Um, sexual desire, right, sexual desire, like I was, you know, it was a generational pattern. And women in my family line that we didn't actually, we came in with, with this sort of, I'm not allowed to have desire program. And my purpose is as a wife and a mother, my purpose in life isn't, um, to be a lover. So I was really good at like checking the boxes of mothering, um, and of mothering him, mothering my children and taking care of my home. But I, I personally really lacked the lover and the self-love and the embodiment piece for myself. And pregnancy. I'm short. I have a very short torso. Um, my body expands in ways that I would be, get very uncomfortable in my skin, and that would further intensify my lack of initiation, my lack of desire, the lack of connection, which would it was sort of this like cauldron of problems. You know, we both wanted these children and we wanted this family and we wanted this life, but there was this big disconnect in our, in our love relationship.

Leah:

libidos, mismatched desire. Then all of that stuff from just generation to generation. The epigenetics of the burden that oftentimes women carry in very religious institutions around, um, you know, sex not being okay. Pleasure isn't for you, it's for the partner. Um, your job is to carry the family. And what people don't understand, people think mothering, right? It's like, oh, it's the greatest feminine, right? It's like we really apply the feminine to mothering, but actually the work of the mother is very masculine. It's not actually totally connected to the essence of the feminine. It's connected more to the

Brit:

So that's a good point.

Leah:

And so I think that that is also a part of like where polarity gets switched off. And also there's all the energy, all the creativity that comes, especially in those early younger years with babies. You are pouring the sexual energy into the child so that the child can thrive and survive and um, and do well in the world. It needs you at that time, in a way, at no other age. And so you're pouring all this life force into the children. And then what's left, you're lucky if you get a scrap for yourself. And then of course, it seems like the, the spouse is feeling neglected and, um, and, and on the outside in some ways. Is that how it felt for, for you also, Bri?

brit & carolee | interview:

It was actually that way from the beginning, and I had several conversations with her, you know, one before our marriage actually. It was like, Hey, I'm really interested in sex. I'm really wanting to do these things. And then, um, and then just many times in marriage where, you know, like, I'm struggling with these emotional connections that I'm making on my phone, and like trying to activate her energy. Like, Hey, why don't you initiate what, what's wrong? Do you not desire me? Am I just not attractive? Like, I was curious as to what was really going on with her because I desired so much to have that deeper sexual connection. It was something that, you know, just as innate in me, like my, you know, my blueprint, right?

Willow:

I'm so curious, Carollee, like what was your journey to finding your way to desire and to awakening, uh, the divine feminine within you? Because as you sit before us today, you seem like a very embodied woman who, who knows, you know, how to, not only her desire, but how to express it. And so I'm

Leah:

Yeah. Is your libido changed?

Willow:

what your journey's been

brit & carolee | interview:

my God.

Willow:

night and day.

brit & carolee | interview:

it is, I feel I call that life my past life.

Willow:

Mm-hmm.

brit & carolee | interview:

It's my past life in this life. there is a com. It's a completely different me. so yeah, like there's so many things that I can say about to, to answer this question. Earlier on in our marriage, I had this intuition that was kind of bubbling up inside of me that, you know, birth control did some really bad things to my body. And the lack of desire that was rooted in epigenetics and generational all the things, um, was also compounded by childhood sexual trauma. So. I didn't actually have proper healing for that trauma. Um, in my family of origin, there was some abuse that, um, a family member cousin had had experienced, and then he perpetuated that. And so there was this, this big family secret, this shame. And I, unfortunately, fortunately, I mean it's all just part of the story was, was part of that. And so I remember early on while we were still Mormon, in fact, I, I have a vivid memory. I can like see it in my mind still very real of being in bed with him and love making and like trying to tell him while we're making love. I think my childhood abuse is blocking me from my connection with you.

Willow:

Hallelujah.

brit & carolee | interview:

That, but at that point he was like, no, it probably isn't. Like we had, we didn't have, I didn't even, I didn't know exactly that. Well, it, we didn't even know what the word codependence meant. And I was in completely codependent, right. Like, so there was zero real embodied emotional intelligence. And so, um, I think part of me felt like if, if I acknowledged that, that then maybe she was broken and I didn't wanna be married to a sexually broken wife. So there, there was blockage there that I was not open.

Leah:

Well, and no one knows what to do in those situations. Having also gone through that Carol Lee, um, you know, a, there's so much shame. And then you start to realize, oh my gosh, this is probably filtering into why I feel so blocked. And then in the moment when it's happening in the moment, partners are never told what to do and how to hold space for that. We don't even know how to hold space for that. This isn't a part of our, I mean, we get, not only do we not really get a sex education, whatever sex education we get is bad sex education. So I mean, and the fact that one out of three women have had some kind of sexual trauma in their life, that means most men are dating people who have encountered some sort of sexual trauma and it's

Willow:

many who have not healed or dealt

Leah:

And how to deal with that sort of thing. So, all right. So there was some awareness that that was in the way.

brit & carolee | interview:

Okay. Yeah. So I had that sort of awareness come to me, but I didn't actually know what to do with it. Um, at that time I even approached my parents again and I kind of, you know, boohooed and cried at them. How come you didn't get me the right therapy? I don't know what to do. I feel like it's affecting my relationship, my life, um, my self love. And so my parents, bless their hearts, good parents. They actually paid for me to have a therapist, like to go to a therapy session that was an lds ld S'S Latterday Saints, the Church of Jesus Christ, latter Day Saints, right? So it's a Mormon therapist. And so I sat down with this Mormon therapist and I kind of, it was a very vulnerable moment for me. Hey, I, I, I have had this realization, I have this, I had this abuse in my childhood. It's affecting me, I think in this way. And I left that appointment never wanting to make an appointment again with this, the, like, I was like, that was so pointless. It was so not helpful at all. And that was all before we had sort of this low, like breaking point in 2017 where um, there was an even bigger kind of moment of infidelity, um, after the birth of our third child. And so at that point, you know, I had had sort of these intuitive hits that said, there's things here for you to look at. I didn't have the tools to know how to look at them. And then we went the route in that disclosure of infidelity in 2017, like Britain mentioned, we actually went the route the church says to go to heal these exact things, which looks a little bit like this. You come together, you talk to the bishop who's the leader of the congregation, like the priest of this area that you go to church in and you confess to the bishop, this is what I did, blah, blah, blah. Then. The severity of the sin, um, can mean that you might need to go before a council of 12 men that are this presidency for the area, and then you confess again to a room of 12 men who then determine what actions you're gonna have to refrain from, you know, what your penance is and the duration of that penance, right? So he kind of is, I mean,

Leah:

no women. There's no women involved.

Willow:

That's terrible. There's no, not healing. There's no healing in

brit & carolee | interview:

There's no healing. So we sat there and I remember, um. Yeah, I remember sitting in this room and he's confessing and all of these men are like nodding their heads, and by this point I had just barely found that trauma-informed yoga group that I was meeting in. There were women, so many women, and I, I remember sitting there. Really kind of holding my own judgements of like, I wonder how many of these men struggle with these exact themes and they're silent about it, and yet they're gonna judge my husband. This is, I was simultaneously bothered and fascinated and judgmental at the same time, but I also felt like, we're gonna do it. We're gonna do it the right way. He's confessing, he's gonna make these changes and it's gonna be better. Um, so they came back and they said, okay, this is your penance. You have to be disfellowshipped for an entire year. And that means no praying publicly. Like there was a list of things he couldn't do at church for that year. And we went home and we took a Polaroid in the backyard, um, and which is on our website.

Willow:

you gotta go to their website and check that out. Their website by the, by the way, y'all, it's called, um, what's it called? The,

Carolee:

magical story of us.com.

Willow:

of Us. It is so beautiful. Their website's gorgeous. Go check it out.

brit & carolee | interview:

So there's a picture there, and in that picture you can see how depressed and like, oh, he, his energy is so heavy and I, I have this little like, hope kind of, that you can kind of feel for me that I'm like, oh, we're doing this right. Um, and that catapulted us into a year of his disfellowship. And in that year I witnessed absolutely zero support for myself from the church, from the organization, from the men. I was so alone. I was living with so much shame. I couldn't tell anybody what I was really going through because I was afraid of their judgments. was afraid of my own judgments

Willow:

That have been a hard year. So isolating and like just no expression, no, no support.

brit & carolee | interview:

Doing it the church way actually was really important because I realized, oh, that by the years end, the trauma was worse in my body. Like I was traumatized now, not just by my marriage, but by the way the church held me through it and not any closer to Jesus or to like healing. And, um, that was a big eyeopener to me. And I realized through that journey and that difficulty and that isolation that, um, I absolutely needed to heal. Um, and that with or without him, whether or not we made it through everything we were going through that I had. Things within me that were generational, that were showing up, that were lack, that that blocked me. So I made a commitment to myself at that point in time that I was gonna prioritize my healing no matter what. I didn't know what that looked like, whether or not he'd stick around or I'd stick around with him as we did this journey. But when we gathered back together with that same group of men a year later, and they were like so proud. Good job, brother and Sister Beckham. That's what Mormons call each other. You know, you've done it. We are here a year. We're ready to reinstate you to full membership in the church. How do you feel? And they turned and looked at me and um, I basically told them off. I said, you've missed the mark. There's no support for women. I don't think you know what you're doing. Like it was a moment of standing up to the patriarchy that their eyes were so big, they weren't expecting me to tell them how ineffective that year was for me as a woman, that they shouldn't be patting themselves on the back.

Willow:

I wonder if they received that. Do you, do you have any, any

Leah:

you know if they took any of that to heart?

Willow:

about what has, what came from that moment of you standing up for yourself and for women and for the whole lineage of women in your, religious history?

brit & carolee | interview:

it's, it, the Mormonism is so contained and from like, from the patriarchal perspective that I think if it was received, there's no way that it would've gotten back to like. The headquarters in Salt Lake. Oh, this woman said this, right. But through me telling the story now it might, you know, like it really might like facilitate that change that I would really love to see, um, in regards to true healing. Um, but in that moment I could tell that what I was saying was impacting the men listening because of the looks on their faces and the way that they were surprised. Um, but more than anything, more than how it affected the out exterior world. It was a moment of my interior world that said, this is you reclaiming you. This is just one piece of that puzzle. Like standing your truth. Yeah. Yeah. It really was.

Leah:

That's amazing. Well, that's a, that's a gorgeous, amazing, uplifting, inspiring moment of truth that you just shared with our whole audience. Thank you for that, and just, I celebrate that moment.

Willow:

Mm-hmm.

Leah:

you and with

Carolee:

Thank you. Yeah.

Leah:

you know, we had Dr. Mike Frazier on the show early, uh, when we started the podcast a couple years ago. And I'm curious what you think of this and if this resonates with what you also observed with within the congregation, with friends, with families. Um, and one of the things that he does with in the cor the Mormon faith is he's a therapist to Mormon men who are finding themselves in their marriages with very unhappy partners. Where there isn't a lot of sex going on, and, and they can't believe it..These, these husbands can't believe it because they were promised, you get married, you sacrifice so much, and then the day you get married and now you get to have all the sex you've ever dreamed of, all the sex you didn't allow yourself to have. Here's your chance. And, and so they just think that this is their right. Their partners aren't having the sex that they want. And so eventually the partners, the spouses are like, I'm not interested in sex with you. I don't like sex with you. I'm not gonna have a lot of sex with you. This isn't, and there's no, because there's no one to go to to try to correct that there becomes this rub. So on the one hand he goes, A lot of the guys that I work with think it's their right. They've been told their whole life that sex is their right and that sex is for them. Meanwhile, they have no idea how to communicate with their partners, how to bring intimacy and connection to their partners, how to have sex in a way that their partners want to have sex. And so then they just find themselves in sexless marriages. And he's trying to help them listen to their partners in different ways. He's teaching them intimacy skills and how to approach their spouse in a way that feels loving, connecting intimacy filled, how to have sex differently. And he is got all sorts of testimonials with the wives coming onto the website and saying, wow, I feel like I'm with a totally different man. And our relationship has been been healed to a degree. Does that paint an accurate picture from your experience?

brit & carolee | interview:

Everything I know about Mormonism and the marriages and the relationships, it's totally accurate. It's totally accurate because there's no education. It's also suppression. And, um, and then they try to like, yeah, they try to like have, uh, this relationship that they've had in their mind about what it should look like, and it just never, it, uh, you know, there's, there's crazy stories, crazy stories in Mormonism because of the sexual repression, like so. Yes, totally.

Leah:

Well, there's

brit & carolee | interview:

Well, and I.

Leah:

a woman's body more. If I think my body is obligated to you, it's gonna be really hard to get turned on.

Carolee:

Yeah,

brit & carolee | interview:

there's a lot of truth to that. Um, I, I'm reminded of a moment that was really, really crucial in my own healing, right? So like, we had had these ruptures and we were trying to heal and we were doing a lot of things. We dove deeply into seeking healing and calling that in. And so much magic was happening in our life. Um, and there was a lot of reclamation for myself as a woman, uh, as a woman of magic and embodiment and connected to the divine feminine. And so I was deepening in all of that. And I had this moment of realization, um, in April of 22 that kind of goes along with what you just said of the mindset of the women in this culture. I identified that I was attached to like my dreams of my childhood. My Little girl, Carollee, what did she dream of when she grew up? It wasn't what career I would have. Um, it wasn't any of that. It was like, oh, I'm gonna get married and I'm gonna have this husband and I'm gonna have this family, and I'm gonna be this wife and this mother and, um, be in this relationship. And I realized that, we had some, we kept choosing into being together and healing as a partnership. And there was a lot of PTSD and betrayal trauma that I was navigating in my somatic like system, right? but I realized one of my blocks were all of my dreams from my childhood that my dreams were this idea. I was attached to this idea of what marriage and partnership was supposed to be like. And then when I really got real about it, I realized, are there any women in my life, in this community who I say they've nailed it, the way in which this partnership enlivens them. And no, I couldn't, I couldn't honestly connect to anybody. I was like, no, we all get together and we kind of bitch and moan and

Willow:

mm

brit & carolee | interview:

about our husbands. And so I realized that somewhere back in my childhood, the program that had been implanted about what my husband and my marriage was supposed to be like, was a false story, a false narrative that perpetuated the patriarchal imbalance and didn't actually give me my sovereignty. And so made me beholden to like service, right? This overarching theme of like, here, I'm here to serve him. Instead of like, I'm here to receive and serve and give and you know, like this dance. And so, um. I actually, sometimes I can be really dramatic. And, um, I took the dress that I wore when we got married in the Mormon temple and I ripped it to shreds. Um,

Willow:

liberating

Leah:

How cathartic.

brit & carolee | interview:

then I also, he had written a poem for me that said it was called the my Little Number one. Um, and he, he had gold embossed on black paper and we had framed it with pictures of our wedding day. Nice. It was really nice, but it was triggering to me because I didn't wanna be a number, I didn't wanna be a number in the sense of like, oh, there's other numbers, you know, so I, I took my dress and I took the poem and I gathered with three other women and I held a witchy grief circle under the full moon. And I, for the first time, I had been so scared to tell people what I was really living through that. So I hadn't admitted to anybody. I was keeping, you know, this was 22. We had been going through infidelity since 2011, off and on, right? So that's a shit ton of time where I'm holding

Willow:

Yes.

brit & carolee | interview:

of it in myself and I spoke it out to these women. I said what we were going through, and I burned my dress in the fire and I burned the poem in the fire. And I said, I am saying goodbye. I know it's so dramatic to all my.

Leah:

Yeah. Well, I would, I would reframe that. I

Willow:

Yeah. Not

Leah:

I think it's an inflection point that of change of like, this is a symbol of what I'm becoming, what I'm changing. It's like an chemical example of, of, you know, because we have trauma, trauma has a gravitational pull to it. It, it's an inflection point too. It says, here's this thing that was so difficult. It's changed me forever. Trauma alters our life forever. But when you have a ritual, a trauma is a, is something of great power. A ritual is also of great power, but it's something that is so positive, that is so transformative that it also alters you into the future forevermore

Carolee:

Exactly. Yeah.

Leah:

The power from a positive ritual can also shake up the trauma from the past. It's like a earthquake and it, and it shakes up the residue of that trauma to start to destabilize the trauma of the past. So I think having rituals of great power that includes something like the full moon and a fire ceremony and cutting something up and using a destructive element for change is kind of so symbolic to all the things you're talking about that are, that are, um, beautiful. So I would say, yeah, maybe drama, but really power

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah. It really actually, it, it felt so that,'cause it was like I have to let go of these hopes and dreams because they were founded on untruth, untruths untrue principles. Um, and I was willing to open myself up to allowing myself to be guided into what a new partnership that would really serve me, could look like. But I had to let go of the past. I had to let go of all of the beliefs I had to surrender them. Um,

Leah:

you know, in order to embody a new

Willow:

Yeah. You have to clear out those old limiting beliefs and those old indoctrinations and patterns. I'm curious Britton, how that was for you, like did you, when she came back from that full moon with you ritual, like what, what was alive and what was inspired with in you? I mean, she burned your poem that she gave you with the wedding pictures. I mean, that's a huge reclamation for her.

Leah:

What was that emotional process for you?

brit & carolee | interview:

Um, the poem hurt a little bit, but it was actually like, I was actually in Denver at the time and I was at a Joe Dispenza retreat and I was, I'm doing the work, right? Like I'm, I'm in deep reclaiming a new life and, um, letting go of the past and doing what she's doing too. And, um, but what's interesting is, you know, two months before in February, um, after we had another beautiful initiatory mushroom experience. Yeah. And the day after that trauma reset again, it was like, you know, when you go up, when you do mushrooms or when you do medicine in spiritual context and ceremony where you actually have strong intention and you have a, a purpose behind it, there is so much more power that can come to you. So we did another one in February of 22. And the next day, like I'm talking to this friend and, um, I, Carleigh and I are laying in bed and she's texting me and I'm texting in her back and she sends me a text and it says something about sex. And it was like what she's navigating in her life, right? It wasn't like there was sexual anything going on between us, but she saw it and she was like, mega triggered, right? And it was like, that was like the drop from the beautiful mushroom ceremony, not even 24 hours before into back indoor trauma. And so, you know, we did, so from February until like May of, of 20 that year, 2022, it was deep work. But what I did was I was like, um, I, I basically said goodbye to our marriage as well. Not in a divorce way. We weren't even near that. We were excited about the potential of the future in a huge way. I took our marriage certificate and I burned it. And, and so I had. Goodbye to that marriage, goodbye, to the order under the church, goodbye to the patriarchy. All of that was like, poof. And I posted it on my Instagram. I'm sure people were like, WTF, like, what's going on?

Leah:

Wow.

brit & carolee | interview:

But it was super powerful and um, I felt so good about it.'cause I was like, oh, now we get to build it on our terms. And the truth is, is after Carol Lee did her clearing, then we could,'cause we had both said goodbye to the past, and by, by May we had planned and executed on a blood moon, a com, a new union ceremony, and we remarried ourselves in our room.

Willow:

Nice.

Leah:

really, that's such a, a beautiful, uplifting, hope filled'cause I think, you know, when you get married and you go through the whole process and then you add kids to the equation and now all your finances are merged, you know, there's so much trauma just from a breakup of like feeling like failures and I think so. I don't think we have a lot of good systems. Available to us in our modern age. Um, a for breaking up consciously, right? How to have divorce and remain friends, you know, and not give all of our money to divorce lawyers. And two, how to actually reinvent who we are now, especially when we meet each other and we're so much younger, and it's like in, in 10, 15, 20 years we have, we have rebuilt our cells every seven years. We have an in completely new body. We replace all the cells in our system. So how are we also not changed emotionally, spiritually, energetically? And how can we grow together when we might be growing at different speeds and in different seasons? So I'm really yeah, impressed with

Willow:

I'm impressed with how, um, quickly you guys started the process because let's go back to this initiatory mushroom journey was in 2019, right? So you guys were going through all of this massive transformation that was not very long ago during COD, right? While the entire earth is

brit & carolee | interview:

We got pregnant one month before the COVID craze.

Leah:

Right. And then you're pregnant again. So now are you worried about all the, the, how was this pregnancy compared to the last three? Now that you've done a little bit of work, is it still, I mean, I'm sure it still is difficult with your body

brit & carolee | interview:

can I answer that? Yeah, go over. Um, so what's interesting is, you know, like the church had shown us this path of healing, which wasn't really any healing at all. It was a path of what they wanted to see is behavioral adaptation. They wanted to see how would we, stop ourselves from doing a thing? That's really it, and you just have to like, pray more and go to church more and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it's not useful. Um, but all of it was basically spiritual bypassing, you know, it doesn't really get to the core of, it doesn't under, you don't confront your energy. You don't confront the reasons why you're doing whatever you're doing. And I knew that the fourth pregnancy. This is why I said that unless God came down himself and told me to have another child, I would not, because I knew it would end us. And it did. It did end us. Because what happened in that fourth pregnancy was I got into another emotional connection with someone, and this was the final catalyst. This was the great thing, needed to finally say to myself, okay, I'm here again. Why am I fucking here again? And I had to really get inward in a way that I hadn't yet about this particular problem. Because we had started our healing journey. We'd started our emotional stuff and, and emotional rein intelligence. She was doing a certification and bringing it home and teaching me. And it was really powerful. So we were getting the tools, but now we needed the actual catalyst to reignite all of it one more time so that we could transcend it. And this is where, this is where I, we really believe in the commitment to, this isn't just about healing. This is about awakening. Okay. Because what we realized was this pathway was the pathway that we had chosen to awaken this catalyst of the church and the suppression of sexual energy and the sexual abuse we both experienced in our childhood. And, um, the infidelity pattern, all of the, all of those things created this scenario where, where we were in 2020 basically. And, and so it was like this moment, I had been given this beautiful kundalini awakening. I had seen things and felt things that were beyond anything that I could comprehend. And then I'm back in it again. And I'm like, what the fuck? So it was like a really big. A moment for me to step into my healing in a, in a real conscious way. And through that, this is where her, the reason why we went through so much in 2021 and then 2022 was like, I mean, just in four months we changed our whole life over. Um, but it was because, um, we needed to finally actually heal this, not just bypass it. So it was, it was another low point for sure. You know? Um, it was really hard. And in 2021 we had to, we got to this point where we're like, we're both in our healing. We're both trying to heal. We got a little Eva, she's like one years old, um, not even one. And, uh, and we're like, can we actually heal together? Do, am I just triggering you too much? I know that you need to heal. She knows. Mm-hmm. And so, you know, with the kids and the nine to five, and we're trying to, we're basically trying to get our healing in from like 9:00 PM to midnight every night. It was really difficult. Um, so, so we did that for a lot, for all of 2021 and then,

Willow:

you guys, so inspiring.

Leah:

where did, where does traveling the world come in at this point? Are you

Carolee:

Where does the what? Oh,

brit & carolee | interview:

okay. Well, so I just wanted to say MDMA came in here, and this is where MDMA shifted things for us in a big way. Uhhuh. So we are able to do an MDMA ceremony in August of that year, and that was like where we reconnected. It wasn't, we were actually gonna talk about how do we separate, how do we consciously uncouple maybe. And actually what happened was we just started making love for three hours and, and it was like this beautiful deep reconnected moment and in our relationship where we were like recharged and re-energized around how we could heal. And that there is still potential here.

Leah:

God. MDMA will do that for a hearts, minds body Souls. It just kind of opens all those connected sensory experiences and kind of go, you get to go to some really divine places on that medicine when our bodies are connected.

Willow:

So where are you guys at now on your journey and where do you, where would you, where are you heading? Tell us current.

Leah:

Wait, wait, wait. Before we get to there, and I know we we're get running outta time, but I wanna know about this traveling the world thing with four kids and you know, I don't wanna miss that part because then you get this bigger retreat center in. Colorado afterwards, so it's like epic chapters.

brit & carolee | interview:

So, um, so I wanna add just real quick, you know, right after that first mushroom journey, the very next week, we had some big gifts come from the universe to support us in this new path that we were forging. We went to a sound healing for the first time and he felt really called to, to that modality. Um, in fact, within a few months he sold all of his guns and used the money to actually buy crystal balls. So there was like this massive shift from this very masculine into this feminine within himself that was like receiving and my heart and emotions, which was so cool for me to see. What came to me was, um, you know, I had in that med medicine journey, this ties into the children. My first medicine journey was all about, I like literally watched my life like it was a movie and what points in my life I was witnessing were all of the moments of my children's births. I had had all our kids at home naturally, and I went back and I was able to reintegrate and see, and I made all these connections about my energy and their energy and things that now I know to be true because people talk about it. But in my world, at that time, it was so fundamentally different than how I'd been raised to view this connected energy. And that propelled me into all of 2020. I was part of a school of emotional healing. It's called the, the Institute of Healing Arts. It's in Linden, Utah. And, um, in that 2020 while also pregnant, I actually was able to heal through this integrative processing technique, those pieces of myself that disassociated from my childhood during the abuse. So full circle back to like healing the trauma for my childhood and healing trauma like we had really effective healing modalities that came and supported that reintegration. So we had this like foundation of this full new way to see emotional health and emotional intelligence with his sound healing. And that supported us, um, the repeat pattern of infidelity. After our fourth child almost broke me. Like it was so significant. The, the woman that had been, that was involved had been somebody who I had let into my home and my heart. And, um, I had actually confided in her the truth of our story, not knowing she was also participating in it in that way. And so like that wounds of betrayal struck me in a way that almost shattered me. But, um, he held strong through that. I held strong through that and we continued to do the work to heal that. And that propelled us into, uh, 2021 was kind of a blur. 2022. At the beginning of 2022, he went to a men's retreat and came home saying, we need to do this thing that I've learned called the full Fuck Yes. Like living this full Fuck yes. What does that look like for us? And so we made these lists of things we wanted to accomplish that year that we hadn't been giving ourselves permission, our entire lives together and apart. We just started saying Yes, yes, to our hearts, yes to these opportunities. Yes. And that led us to the point where in June of 22, we attended a week long retreat, also here in Colorado. Colorado's had an important part of our story, um, that brought a sexual reeducation, um, ISTA. So yeah, we did, if you've heard of Ista. Yeah. So we did.

Leah:

Uh, School of International Temple Arts.

brit & carolee | interview:

So we attended that and that was revolutionary for ourselves, that reeducation,

Leah:

who were your teachers at that one? Who

brit & carolee | interview:

um, Triambika.,

Willow:

Yeah, we

brit & carolee | interview:

Triambika and Juan. And Stacy. Yeah, yeah Triambika, Juan and Stacy were the ones who facilitated and that was amazing. Like, we left that and they say after Ista, don't do anything big, just like let this energy settle.

Leah:

Big

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah. Yeah. So we took the advice, obviously, we went home and put our house on the market.

Willow:

Nice. You're like, we're outta here. We gotta go somewhere where we're, where we can be surrounded and supported.

brit & carolee | interview:

Yeah. So we sold our house, we sold basically every piece of furniture that we owned inside the house. Like we let it all go. And by October of 2022, we were living in Bali with our four kids. Um, so caution, if you end up saying, I'm gonna live the full, fuck Yes. Your life's gonna go wild really quickly.

Leah:

My husband would love to do that. Let's sell a house and everything in it, and I'm like, mm.

brit & carolee | interview:

it, was actually so good. So yeah, we lived in Bali for five months and then that evolved into a deeply spiritually guided soul level pilgrimage world schooling adventure with our kids, which took us to Vietnam and then, um, France, England, Ireland, Scotland, and Egypt. Um, and there are so many stories to say about the magic, literal magic that happened in all of these places as we stood on sacred land and had remembrance after re remembrance come forth about who we are and like the love that we have as individuals and as a partnership. Um, and ultimately through more magic we were guided here to Colorado. Where we're now, um, in this beautiful home on 46 acres.

Leah:

It's a retreat center, right?

brit & carolee | interview:

We're turning it into that. That's what our intention is.

Leah:

where where are you at with that

brit & carolee | interview:

So we're trying, we're right now, we're in the process.'cause I was out of work for three years. I, I, she mentioned failed to mention I left my career in the end of 21, so that was another sole step. But, uh, we've been outta work for three years, so there's no consistent income. So we, you know, we're, we're basically acquiring this property and we have a site map and a plan, and we're gonna turn this into a really awesome community facilitating space for healing and for couples work and for embodiment and, and astrology and magic. So it's gonna be this really, we're calling it Ana Hotta Mystery

Willow:

when, uh, when it's all set up and we'll come run some retreats there with you guys.

Carolee:

Yes. Oh, great.

brit & carolee | interview:

That'd be awesome.

Leah:

Uh, so are you guys working with individuals and couples or

brit & carolee | interview:

that is our intention. So we have, um, we have coaching set up, so we'd love to, to offer this wisdom, this embodied path that we've walked to others. And we've built this program called Reframing Infidelity. You can check it out at reframinginfidelity.love And, um, this is a really beautiful program that we guide other couples through, recapturing their power, getting out of victim mentality, finding forgiveness, reestablishing trust and truth in the relationship, all of those necessary things. And then moving into, um, deeper connection within the union.

Willow:

Is this just for couples or can people who have decided to step away from the couple and are still healing from infidelity utilize this as well?

brit & carolee | interview:

Um, it's for singles and couples. So, yeah, like, I mean, I, we both know and made a commitment in our own journey that with or without each other, whether or not we stayed as a partnership, that we needed our self-healing. And so the program that we've created specifically for infidelity actually is, is that. It's like this is first and foremost for the individual. These are the actual. Very effective tools that we discovered as we gave everything to healing this, that actually what helped move the energy, clear the energy and start new. Um, and so if, if there are couples that have been through this same story and they're really struggling to like put the pieces back together and create the union that they've always wanted, it's ideal for that scenario when two people can come to it together. But also like it's fundamental principles for for anybody. So yeah, it goes for both.

Leah:

Well, I have to say in closing, two things. One is, uh, you've got a lot of great content for your podcast, which is launching, so what's, what's the

brit & carolee | interview:

Well, it's all branded under the magical story of us. So we have our, our podcast, which is called The Magical Story of Us. You can find it on Spotify already. We soft launched it, but it's, it's coming out. We're gonna be talking about it real soon. Um, and we've actually been recording the Magical Journey overview, so that's kind of what's on there right now. We're authoring two books. One of my story, my version, my Healing Journey, and then hers and how they intertwine and weave. And that's called The Magical Story of Us. You can just follow us from the magical story of us.com and join into our mailing list and follow our socials. This is where we're gonna be, offering all of our services from. So, yeah, very excited

Leah:

Yeah, and so I just wanna say, you know, you guys have been a really beautiful example for our show and community of reimagining sex and intimacy in relationships. So congratulations. We look forward to watching your journey unfold as the future chapters are

brit & carolee | interview:

Thank you. Thank you so much. You too. Thanks Willow.

Willow:

Pleasure to have you both.

Leah:

Alright, y'all, well, the show's not over. Please stay tuned for the Dish with myself and Dr. Willow.

Announcer:

Now our favorite part, the dish.

Willow:

What a fun interview. I love hearing people's stories and their story really is magical. I mean, there are so many inflection points along their journey, and I'm so impressed that they've done the healing that they've done together. It is, uh, an extra added element to do this deep level of healing work while in partnership, especially in a partnership that you've been, um, betrayed by

Leah:

Oh my God. We've got religious trauma, we've got sexual trauma, we've got infidelity trauma, we've got holy smokes. It is like so set up to fail, and

Willow:

Carol Lee is my new shero.

Leah:

Yeah.

Willow:

She has been doing some good deep work on herself, and I love how Britain just like continues to rise up within himself so that he can be, you know, the, the partner that he probably has always wanted to be and uncondition that old conditioning pattern stuff so that he can find it. His true self and his new way forward. And I also have to say that I really love that plant medicine and MDMA have been a part of their awakening because it is one of those things that can really change the trajectory of your life in a great way.

Leah:

Totally. We'll have him back on the show. One of the things we spoke about backstage after the interview was we didn't have time. There were so many elements. To their story. We'd even have time to talk about what their sexual life is like now and how much that is transformed. I mean, they hinted at it with talking about some of the medicine journeys that they were on, but it sounds like Carolee had a real full sexual awakening within her own body access, I imagine, to more pleasure. Be fun to really hear about what that looked like. You know, just spending time on the erotic portion of their story. I feel like there's a whole lot more to pour into and, uh, and my experiences that that plant medicine does really open up one system, one's body really can contribute powerfully to the sexual awakening that can happen in someone's system. And brings a sacred spiritual element to what that sexual capacity is. I think in particular to the feminine. It has a dramatic shift That gives us access to things that are truly unbelievable and really feel miraculous.

Willow:

Absolutely. I feel like, you know, I've been doing it, uh, these medicines since I was probably like 13 or 14 years old, so, such, such a long time that I forget how miraculous they can be when you start them later in life. So it's really fun for me. To be, be working now with, with baby boomers and people, you know, in, in different age ranges. And I mean, I think these guys are younger than us, but still them coming to it at a later time in their life. You know, it's like so cool to witness the, the power and the magnificent transformation that is possible when doing that work. And when you couple it with sacred sexual work. Not maybe at the same time if you're facilitating, but as a partnership. Yeah, as a partnership. I think it's just so powerful. It's so, game changing.

Leah:

Yeah, I'm really happy for them, proud of them, celebrate with them. It's really uplifting, to watch Love Conquer so many obstacles, so many reasons to break up, to turn away from each other. They had so many things up against them. It's, it's amazing.

Willow:

Their story is magical for

Leah:

mean, many of us will do some of that with three or four relationships, you know, and just getting, getting, anchoring some of that healing, you know, in different chapters with different people. It's remarkable that they were able to do that with each other. It'll be really fun to see what they create.

Willow:

And beautiful where they're heading. Yeah. Excited to see what they, um, do in Colorado.

Leah:

Yeah,

Willow:

All

Leah:

well everybody have a beautiful night, day or morning. We love you.

Willow:

love.

Announcer:

Thanks for tuning in. This episode was hosted by Tantric Sex Master Coach and positive psychology facilitator, Leah Piper, as well as by Chinese and Functional Medicine doctor and Taoist Taxology teacher, Dr. Willow Brown. Don't forget your comments, like subscribes and suggestions matter. Let's realize this new world together.

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Dr. Willow Brown

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Leah Piper

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Britton and Carolee Beckham

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